Columbia House: The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)

Gathered together from the cosmic reaches of the universe, here in this great screening room with comfortable recliners, are the most powerful forces of good ever assembled. Keith!

Okay, fine. Either way, I came up with something and I said it and it worked out nicely.

Terry! All monies of this episode will go straight to Paris. Don't annoy me. Derek!

Go talk to him. You got the eyes and the ears where they're supposed to be according to humans. And the power twins, Zap and Jordan, with their magical lemur snort dedicated Welcome back to Fumbling Their Way Through Movies, one forgotten gem at a time. This week, we come in peace with 1951's The Day the Earth Stood Still. This is Fumbling Through Film.

So long as you were limited to fighting among yourselves with your primitive tanks and aircraft, we were unconcerned. But soon, one of your nations will apply atomic energy to spaceships. That will create a threat to the peace and security of other planets. That, of course, we cannot tolerate. What exactly is the nature of your mission, Mr. Klaatu? I came here to warn you that by threatening danger, your planet faces danger. Very grave danger. I'm prepared, however, to offer a solution. Would you care to be more specific? What I have to say must be said to all concerned. It is too important to be entrusted to Any individual. I gather that your efforts on the official level were not entirely successful. I come to you as a last resort, and I confess my patience is wearing thin. Must I take drastic action in order to get a hearing? What, what sort of action do you mean? Violent action, since that seems to be the only thing your people understand.

Hello and welcome to another one-of-a-kind, genre-defining, brand new episode of Bumbling Through Film, the only show that dares to bring together 3 dudes to talk about movies. But these, these aren't just any movies.

Exactuabrada, Nick Foley.

Executively.

Executively.

These are the ones we've—

I'm not done.

Oh, you're not done?

How dare you just ramrod over me? How dare you?

Well, you started with executively. I'm just like, well, you can't top that.

Oh sure. Okay. Go on.

All right, Terry. What are you going to say?

Well, I was going to say something really clever, but there definitely could be any movie.

Were you going to say exacto brada nicto lee?

I wish I would have, you know, edit that in. Exacto brada nicto lee.

These, however, are the ones we've missed, overlooked, or feel are simply worth revisiting. That, dear listener, is truly Eddie Movie.

Hmm. Not truly, maybe falsely.

No, truly. Uh, truly, my name is Derek and I am truly a fumbler. Joining me here in the Fumbledome, where he is also a true fumbler, but he's also the Prime Minister of Fumbling and Film. He's Keith.

Hey, what's up everybody? KG, fumbler extraordinaire. Uh, and I too like to, uh, speak in a language that you guys understand.

You like to speak in a language that we understand? Is that what you said?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Thank you, dude. I like that too.

Yeah.

It makes this whole process so much easier.

Well, I meant violence, but you know.

Oh, violence.

Yeah.

Well, I understand that too. Put up your dukes.

I mean, people might have forgot what the opening clip was already because of the confusion of Executively, but that's all right.

It's possible.

Jesus, you guys both got too quiet on me.

Yeah, the one that's not quiet is the Dr. Dre of Kansas, Terry.

Howdy, y'all. It's me, man of Earth.

Earth man.

Earth man. Uh, nervous Earth man. Um, if a spaceman shows up and, you know, meets me, I'll probably be scared of him.

Really? Even if it was as pleasant as Mr. Klaatu?

Well, it might be just, just clapping.

If he was nice, maybe I'd be okay with it. He's a very pleasant man until he starts talking about blowing up New York, and I got a little nervous.

He's very tall and well-groomed, speaks well, doesn't sweat a lot because he wears the same suit the entire time, doesn't die.

He is unkillable. He doesn't multiply either.

So he doesn't multiply.

Oh, uh, we don't die, we just multiply.

I think it's a rap lyric of some sort.

We don't die, we multiply. That's Bebe's kids.

Okay, fine. Either way, I came up with something and I said it and it worked out.

You didn't even come up with it. It was somebody else.

No, I, I said it in, well, the context of things. See, this is why I prefer to speak a language that people understand.

Yeah, that was a moment where you did not speak a language we understood.

No.

And lyrics, we don't understand lyrics.

I just want to bring violence instead.

You know what else brings violence?

Podcasts.

This podcast, every week we choose violence from the, from the jump.

Yeah.

And then we choose peace because I tell everybody what it is we do here. So let me do that again. I'm extending the olive branch because every week we watch movies, but not just any movie. Nuh-uh. Every month one of us chooses a theme, a genre, a guiding light. some sort of smooth surface spaceship that opens to a door and you're like, wow, where'd that come from? And then we each choose a movie that adheres to that theme, genre, or smooth surface spaceship that opens up to a door and you're like, wow, where'd that come from? And then on the 4th week, we truly fumble by watching a movie that was randomly given to us by a malevolent wheel. Now this week, this special week, because we are in DTF, Down to Fumble, Y2, year 2, M10. That M stands for month, and we're on dub 1. It's a new M, and I'm starting with a new dub, and that M is a me M. And I kind of went a little bit crazy this, this month.

I—

very restrictive, but I was feeling nostalgic. Today's— I'm gonna tell the abbreviated story. When instead of having cable, my family got to choose movies once a month from Columbia House, so we get a VHS that the same amount as cable, but we only got one movie that we could watch over and over again along with broadcast television. So what I did was I found an old Columbia House advert from 1992 that has 3 LaserDiscs for a dollar apiece, and we are each going to choose a movie off of that, that sacred list of like 80-something movies, and we're gonna fill out our, our initial order.

For that question, yeah, each month you guys could pick one. Uh, yes, on that, who got to pick like the original like 8 or whatever it is that you got for—

I don't know, I think we each got to choose one, I think, because there was 8 of us in the house and then it rotated. So we each got to pick like a movie a year. It was pretty awesome.

What a, what a treat.

Double up around the holidays, things like that.

Because this is my month, this is dub 1. I got to choose the first movie. I went through the list and I chose a classic because that's what I usually do when we got to choose movies, because I've only got one choice. I better pick something good.

Yeah, you always do that.

Well, back in the day when I only had one choice a year, I had to make sure I made it count.

Oh, it makes— yeah, that makes sense.

So I did that again this time, and I chose number 0576042. The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951.

That is an old classic.

Now, before we talk about our viewing of 0576042, The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951, before a deep dive, 0576042, The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951, did any of us have any previous knowledge, history, or experience with number 0576042, The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951?

I, I know of it. I knew of it, and I think I've even seen the Keanu version, but, uh, I'd never seen this before, actually.

Wow, nice. I've seen it a few times. It's a— it's one of those old classics. Yeah, I'm just kind of back in when I first was getting into movies, I watched it, and I've watched it a few times since then, and I watched it again for the show.

Wow, it is an old classic. It is one that is near and dear to my heart because it was one of those, uh, I've talked about this quite frequently, but like Saturday afternoon monster movies on in Chicagoland area on Son of Svengoolie show. And this is one that would come on, War of the Worlds and some other ones, Godzilla movies. But this is one that I've always loved. I hadn't seen in a long time, uh, so this was a nice little refreshing, uh, rewatch.

Revisit your childhood.

Revisit my childhood. Was my childhood ruined? We'll see.

Was it disintegrated by a laser beam?

Possibly. My childhood was very fragile.

Anything could disintegrate that.

Yeah, just a light breathe— breeze. Or light breathe as well. No, my childhood—

That was a heavy breathe.

Still, same effect. Destroyed my childhood. All right, boys, uh, stop destroying my childhood and relax.

Oh, okay, fine.

Because I'm going to take us closer than you could have ever imagined to The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951 in another patent-pending Fumbler's Deep Dive. All right. The Day the Earth Stood Still. This son of a bitch premiered in New York City on September 18th, 1951. If you're looking at your calendars, that was last Friday, would have been the 25th— or I'm sorry, 75th anniversary. Wow.

Wow, what timing.

After the New York City premiere, released widely over the next 2 weeks, depending on where you were in the country. I think they had to take some time to get the reels out, I guess. It is rated G. I think it was probably approved at the time. It is 1 hour and 32 minutes. An alien lands in Washington, D.C. and tells the people of Earth that they must live peacefully or be destroyed as a danger to other planets.

Spoiler.

Big spoiler.

I feel like that's the big reveal.

I know, it's like the end of the movie.

He's like, I won't tell anyone why I'm here. And then at the end he tells them.

It gets a 7.7 on IMDb and a 92% Certified Fresh on Rotten Tomatoes after 111 reviews. So a lot of after-the-fact reviews came in and they're all mostly positive. It earned $5.3 million at the box office back in the day. Uh, on roughly a $1 million budget. $5.3 million, that was good enough for 31st on the year.

Wow.

Didn't have any weeklies, but for the total of the year, that's 2 spots behind Ma and Pa Kettle Back on the Farm.

Great. It lost to that.

Is that a sequel?

I don't know.

It was like that title, The Day the Earth Stood Still, is such a great title. And it lost to Ma and Pa Kettle on the Back to the Farm.

Back on the Farm. Yeah, but it also finished 8 spots in front of Abbott and Costello Meet the Invisible Man.

Oh, that's fine.

But you're probably wondering, what were the top 10 movies at the box office in 1951? What kept The Day the Earth Stood Still from getting to the low 20s? Well, here they are. Number 10, Detective Story, starring Kirk Douglas and Eleanor Parker.

Wow.

Number 9, Across the Wide Missouri. I'm sure it's pronounced Missouri. Starring Clark Gable and Ricardo Montalbán.

Ooh, interesting.

Fine, crazy leather.

Number 8, On Moonlight Bay, starring Doris Day and Gordon MacRae. That all rhymes. Doris Day, Bay Day, MacRae.

That's awesome. I like this.

Have a have a day with McCray and Day at the Bay.

The Bay.

Number seven, Alice in Wonderland, Disney's animated feature. Number six, you'll be like, oh, I've heard of this one. The Thing from Another World.

No way.

Yes.

Wow, I can't believe that ranks so much higher.

Number five, I've never heard of this movie. Quo Vadis, starring Robert Taylor and Deborah Kerr. It was a Best Picture nominee that year.

Hmm, I mean, I'm sure it's got to be good then.

Yeah. Number 4, The African Queen, starring Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn.

I've seen that.

Number 3, A Place in the Sun, starring Montgomery Clift and Elizabeth Taylor. That was also a Best Picture nominee.

I don't know why I thought you were about to say Montgomery Burns.

That's the first thing I thought of when I saw it too. Number 2, A Streetcar Named Desire, starring Marlon Brando and Vivien Leigh. Uh, Best Picture nominee as well. And then finally, number 1, the top movie at the box office in 1951, An American in Paris, starring Gene Kelly and Leslie Caron. Best Picture winner that year.

Oh, wow.

Topped the box office, topped the awards ceremony.

See, this is back in the day.

That's a rarity nowadays.

Yeah, it is.

You didn't need an American. You could just have an American go to Paris and everything's normal and fine. Nowadays you gotta send a werewolf down there. Some sort of zombie, you know, you gotta spice it up these days to get the audience's attention.

Yeah, you're right.

Now it'd be they'd send somebody from Paris to Paris, Texas instead.

Oh boy.

Yeah, or an American in Paris, Illinois.

Oh yeah, yeah, an American in Paris, Illinois. Oh God, could you imagine?

No, I've been, I've been through Paris, Illinois. It's not as, um, Is not the city of lights that you would hope it would be.

That's a shame.

It is.

We'll fix that.

We'll do our damnedest, that's for sure.

Yeah, we'll buy it some lights.

All money of this episode will go straight to Paris, Illinois.

Oh yeah, all proceeds.

All proceeds of this specific episode.

Yes.

This movie is directed by Robert Wise. He was born on September 10th, 1914. So if you're keeping score at home, that was just a couple weeks ago. He got into the movie industry at the age of 19, working in a sound studio. And then you know what? Orson Welles is like, I need an editor for Citizen Kane. And, uh, so he did that.

Really?

Yes.

That's groundbreaking editing, I'm pretty sure too. I'm pretty sure that was one of the first movies that really like modernized some of the editing.

Yep.

Orson Welles was like, hey you, what are you up to over there?

Pretty much. So that's the way the little biography made it sound like. He has 42 directing credits to his name going back to 1942. Symmetry. He's got some bangers for sure, but he did start with some B movies like The Curse of the Cat People.

And oh, that's a sequel to Cat People, I think.

And The Body Snatcher in 1945.

Cat People original is really good.

Is it? In 1956, he did Helen of Troy. Which I assume was a historically accurate Helen of Troy.

Yeah, maybe.

In 1961, he did— he won some Oscars with West Side Story.

Oh, fancy fancy.

In 1965, he won some more Oscars with The Sound of Music.

Okay, well, he's just some kind of wise guy.

In 1972, he did The Andromeda Strain.

Whoa.

Yeah. In 1979, he did Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

Oh, I really like that. This guy's awesome.

But in 1963, he did The Haunting. Hill House has stood for about 90 years and appears haunted. Its inhabitants have always met strange, tragic ends. Now, Dr. John Markway has assembled a team of people who he thinks will prove whether or not the house is indeed haunted. Stars Julie Harris, Claire Bloom, and Richard Johnson. And it's an adaptation of the Shirley Jackson novel of The Haunting of Hill House.

Yeah, that's crazy.

I agree.

I haven't seen that at all. This is awesome. I like this.

Yeah, he's got, he's got a really, he's got a lot of really cool titles on his, uh, his filmography.

Even a couple of those may actually be on the, uh, the LaserDisc advertising.

It's possible. West Side Story and Sound of Music, I think, are.

Yeah, I saw those 2 for sure. Sure, I, I thought I saw Star Trek on there.

Yep, it is. You are correct.

You know, it's funny, I've seen Body Snatcher as well. That's pretty good. This guy, he's just got it all. He's got it all. And I really like his— he's done a little bit of everything. He does weird horror films.

Yeah, musicals, horrors, sci-fi, Star Trek.

Shit.

This movie is written by Edmund H. North, and it's based on the story by Harry Bates. Harry Bates is best known for The Day the Earth Stood Still, which is based on his story called Farewell to the Master. It was originally published in October 1940 issue of pulp magazine Astounding Stories. He published one novel under the pseudonym Anthony Gilmore. It was called Spacehawk: The Greatest of Interplanetary Adventures. Oh, being as it didn't have a follow-up, it couldn't have been that great.

Can't be that great. Yeah.

Well, I mean, he was the greatest, so they didn't have to do a follow-up.

Yeah, you're right. We've reached the pinnacle of interplanetary adventure.

It wasn't, it wasn't, uh, Spacehawk, the great interplanetary adventure.

Penultimate greatest of planetary adventures.

By the same creator.

And then the third in the trilogy, greatest.

Yeah.

He just did it all at once.

From 1929 to 1933, he was the original editor for Astounding Stories of Super Science. He was the editor of Strange Tales magazine from '31 to '33 as well.

Nice.

Edmund H. North has 35 writing credits going back to 1934. Such things as Bunker Bean.

Okay.

Dishonored Lady.

Oh, we're not going into Bunker Bean.

Okay.

I like this one too. And we're not going into it either. Young Man with a Horn.

No.

Oh my.

That sounds like a trilogy. Bunker Bean, uh, Dishonored Lady, with the horn.

Yeah.

Well, Sink the Bismarck! It has an exclamation point at the end. Then also Damn the Defiant! It also has an exclamation point at the end. And a movie called Meteor. But in 1970, he wrote the screenplay for the Oscar-winning Patton.

Oh.

The World War II phase of the career of controversial American General George S. Patton. Directed by Franklin J. Schaffner, co-written by Francis Ford Coppola, stars George C. Scott, Karl Malden, and Stephen Young.

Never seen it.

Me neither.

It is, it is also, uh, it's under 0043092.

It's an option. This movie stars Michael Rennie as Klaatu. He has 118 acting credits in TV and film going back to 1931. He did 9 episodes of Climax, 77 episodes of The Third Man. He played Harry Lime. That was the name of his character.

Lime?

Yes, Harry Lime.

He was a... That's gross sounding.

Agreed. He did an episode of The Man from UNCLE.

Isn't Harry Lime kind of just a kiwi?

Yes, kinda. He was Inspector in the movie Death Cell.

That sounds cool.

He played Anthony Hale in Tower of Terror. Oh, he played Jean Valjean in Les Misérables. Oh, he was in a TV movie called Mark Dolphin.

But hey, I'd love to know more about that.

I know, because in 1966 he played Garth A7 in Cyborg 2087.

Whoa.

Earth civilization of the future sends a cyborg back to the 1960s to change the future. Directed by Franklin Adrian, stars Michael Rennie, Karen Steele, and Wendell Corey.

Kind of sounds like Terminator.

Yeah, exactly. That's what I thought.

A friendlier version of Terminator, maybe?

Possibly. This movie also stars Patricia Neal as Helen Benson. She has 73 acting credits in TV and film going back to 1949. She did an episode of the Goodyear Television Playhouse, 2 episodes of Playhouse 90, 2 episodes of Play of the Week, an episode of The Bastard.

What? Okay.

2 episodes of Kung Fu.

Nice.

And movies like She played Miss Trollope in Caroline? She has a question mark at the end. She's uncredited for her role as Patricia Neal in the TV movie The Patricia Neal Story.

What?

Her name is— she's—

She's uncredited?

Yes.

Uncredited as the lead person?

I guess so. She was Maura Prine in The Night Digger. She was Susan North in The Venusian.

Oh.

She played Carrie Perry in Happy Mother's Day, Love George. But—

Wow.

In 1981, she played Stella in Ghost Story. 2 generations of men find themselves haunted by the presence of a spectral woman. When the son of one of the elderly men returns to his hometown after his brother's mysterious death, They attempt to unravel her story. Directed by John Irvin, stars Craig Wasson, Alice Krigg, and Fred Astaire.

Huh.

Okay.

Your story. Finally, this movie stars Lock Martin as Gort.

Ooh.

He has 12 acting credits going back to 1944. 11 of them he is uncredited for. And one, he played Gort. He was Giant in Anchors Aweigh, and Aweigh is spelled A-W-E-I-G-H.

Ew.

He played Bob in Lost in a Harem.

Whoa.

He played Big Sailor in Off Limits, but in 1954, he played Yeti In The Snow Creature.

Cool.

The role—

American botanical expedition in the Himalayas stumbles upon a Yeti den, captures one, and transports it back to Los Angeles, where it escapes while customs officials are debating whether it is animal or human. Directed by W. Lee Wilder, stars Paul Langton, Leslie Dennison, and Terushimada.

Not to be close-minded, but I don't think a Yeti is human.

Humanoid, but not a human.

It could be like, you know, an ancestor, but it's not a human. It's— it is very distinct from human.

Yes, but it's also not an animal though. I, I guess it's a creature.

It's whatever Bigfoot is.

True. If we can figure out what Bigfoot is, we'll figure out what Yeti is.

That's the one thing. If we could ever catch a Bigfoot, then we will know what the Yeti is. And also, yes, the Red Man. and all these various other hairy beasts that live. The skunk ape, that's another one.

Yeah, Sasquatch himself.

Harry from Harry and the Hendersons.

He was a Bigfoot though, we know what he was.

Those little furry fellows that, uh, hit the AT-ATs with their—

Ewoks?

No, no, what were those guys? Were the, uh, Wampas, right? That Luke cut the arm off of.

Oh yeah, yeah.

Oh, that is more yeti, like a Wampa. Yeah, we need to figure out what they are. Yeah, that's like, that's like, well, I guess technically not future yeti, it'd be like past yeti because it was a long time ago.

Mated with a Wookiee.

Those things I used to think were like amazing.

Wookiees?

Uh, the Wampas. It's one, like one of my favorite. I really enjoy Empire Strikes Back. The, uh, The Hoth stuff though is great, and I really like the Wampas. I think they're awesome.

Yeah, if a Wampa and a Chewbacca combined—

Wampaca, Chewampa. Yeah, Chumbawamba. Yeah, who wants some Day of the Earth Stood Still fun facts?

I don't know if I can take them after that last comment.

I got lots of editing ahead of me.

That's— no. It's so good so far.

It is. It really is. To give the appearance of seamlessness to the spaceship, the crack around the door was filled with putty, then painted over.

I hope they don't have to use that again.

When the door opened, the putty was torn apart, making the door seem to simply appear.

Oh, well, I guess they didn't use it again and it worked out great.

The equations seen on Professor Bernhardt's blackboard are authentic physics that describe a particular form of the famous 3-body problem in Newtonian gravitation.

Whoa.

That's cool.

A problem which has no general closed-form solution.

Unless you ask Claude to.

I know.

Or Will Hunting.

Is that an actual character's name, Will Hunting?

Yeah, he's hunting him.

Hunting him.

Yeah.

Wow, I didn't know that's his name. That's funny.

Good one.

Now you do. The more you know. Patricia Neal admitted in interviews that she was completely unaware during the filming that the film would turn out so well and become one of the great sci-fi classics of all time. She assumed it would be just another one of the then-current and rather trashy flying saucer films. And she found it difficult to keep a straight face while saying her lines.

Wow.

Okay. I mean, she says one of the very iconic sci-fi lines too. She's like, Klaatu barada nikto. To increase the sense of reality, some of the most famous broadcast journalists of the time were hired to do cameos as themselves. Including Gabriel Heater, H.V. Kettleborn, Drew Pearson, and Elmer Davis.

Wow.

I don't know which one's the guy with the hat, but—

That was weird. Like, he's doing an in-studio broadcast, so he's wearing a hat. That threw me off.

It's the style of the time.

This is vibe. Yeah.

Men wore hats. I'm one of those hat guys.

Yeah. Indoors, outdoors, I'm wearing that hat. On the job, off the job. You didn't catch me without that thing.

This is my favorite fun fact of this one. The Army refused to cooperate after reading the script. The studio then approached the National Guard, which had no qualms about seeing the Army depicted in a less than flattering light and gladly offered their cooperation.

So the National Guard played the Army?

Yes, because the Army is made to look pretty stupid in this movie.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, they don't have the best moments at all.

The design of Spaceship was reportedly based on the interior of a Frank Lloyd Wright office building.

Okay, I don't know what that is exactly.

Frank Lloyd Wright was like a really famous, uh, architect, particularly in the, uh, Midwest Great Lakes region. He always designed like crazy houses and stuff.

Okay, very futuristic.

I, I used to live, uh, used to live down the street from one of them when I was in Wisconsin.

Yeah, there's quite a few of them around here. According to Danny Elfman, Bernard Herrmann's score inspired him to become a composer.

Hmm.

This is what did it. Wow.

When not walking in full stride, Michael Rennie kept his arms dead at his sides, a character treatment to subtly emphasize his alien nature.

Well, I get— I just assumed he couldn't lift them in that giant thing.

Or he didn't really even have arms. They were just like wooden.

Yeah, it didn't look like there was any joints to move. So I was like, I thought he just couldn't do it.

Klaatu adopts the name Carpenter while hiding from the authorities in a none-too-subtle nod to the film's intentional Christ allegory. Oh, I guess he does come back from the dead.

That's true. You know what?

Closest to it.

Maybe he is Christ.

Mm-hmm.

I would like it if Christ showed up, like, yeah, with the scientists. I was like, what do I have to do to get people to listen to people of New York? It's like, whoa, Jesus, calm down.

I guess he's also pitching like the, you know, good to each other.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. I, and while he was in his tomb, the boulder was moved by a robot, which I like to think actually happened in Bible times.

Well, yeah. I mean, God sent down his robot army to save Jesus from death and then They threw him into the pod and took him up, and yeah, it worked out great. We should rewrite the Bible and add a few things.

Oh, I think we should read it and do a podcast.

I'm sure somebody already does.

Oh, I guarantee somebody's doing that.

Fumbling Through Faith.

Klaatu leaves the address of 1412 Harvard Street, Northwest, D.C. for Professor Barnhart. That is indeed Friends, a real address.

Uh-oh.

Yep.

He doxxed somebody.

The movie had to buy the address and destroy the house so that way— I made that part up.

Burn it down.

Yep.

Fans clamoring, number 32 worldwide film.

This movie is ranked— was ranked number 5 on the American Film Institute's list of the 10 greatest films in the genre of sci-fi As of June of 2008. I'm sure it's been updated since then, but in 2008, number 5 made the cut. And then finally, The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951 is indeed included in the famous reference book 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die. Yes, for its smart and serious approach to science fiction.

Fun facts. Uh, abound.

Tons of fun facts, some of the funnest we've seen yet.

I learned about Young Man with Horn or whatever you said.

Yes, Bunker Bean.

Well, not really. I learned—

Bunker Bean and Young Man with Horn. Yeah, they're on the list.

I know nothing about either of those besides the name, but that's a great name if it really sticks in your head. So it's Great.

I have a feeling Young Man with a Horn says everything you need to know about it in the title.

Half man, half rhinoceros.

A young trumpet player is torn between an honest singer and a manipulative heiress.

Uh-oh, it's a love triangle. That's not what I expected this horn to be. I did think it's a love horn. Trumpet is the love horn. Yeah.

Yeah, it's the most romantic of horns.

The trumpet is. Yeah.

But what we should do now, boys, since we've made it this far, we need to talk about our viewing of The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951.

I think we really should. I think we really should.

I think we've earned that right.

Yes, I think this movie is everything I was hoping from with The Thing from Another World.

Yes.

Like, this is actually a good movie and it holds up. And it's like, you know, people review it very well and it— you could see why. Take From Another World, it's reviewed fairly well and you go like, well, I kind of get some parts, but really?

I think the biggest thing for me, this movie, it— because it is 1951, it has that 1951 pacing.

Yep.

There's, there's really some slow parts, like when they're driving in the taxi. Yeah, that part's the worst. It's just like, oh, we're driving past an army truck. Oh, we're driving past another army truck.

This is not suspenseful at all.

And we need, and we need every army truck to then report back that they just saw us.

Yes, they just drove by. They just drove by. Like, oh Christ.

And they have to have like 10 of them do it before they go, okay guys, let's cut them off at those crossroads.

This is the alien quote unquote invader. Why not just blast it?

Yeah, I agree. Blow up the taxi.

Whoever's in that car with him is just a bunch of, uh, sympathizers.

Collateral damage.

Yeah, that's what you have to do to protect the Earth. At all costs.

At all costs. Yep.

Just burn that taxi cab to the ground.

I mean, the driver is collateral damage. She's obviously a traitor to the—

Yeah, to the human race.

Yeah.

Yeah. So let's we can take her out as well, or we could just let her walk away without questioning anything because.

But you know what? If they blow up that taxi, then you have a sequel because the son comes back when he's old enough for revenge.

Hmm. Against the army?

Yeah.

Okay.

With him and the robot. Oh, the court.

Yeah. He teams up with the court. Yeah. Maybe Clotz who gave him the keys to go to Glort's magical the. Codes or something.

Oh, I saw it. It's more like a—

it's like a buddy cop. It's like a buddy cop film then.

What was the kid's name? I don't remember. Danny.

Bobby. Kevin.

Bobby, Danny, Kevin, and Gort. Yeah, there's 4 of them.

He made some friends. Yeah, other people whose families have been killed by it.

You guys want to go kill the army?

Yeah, I know a robot. Danny and Kevin, let's climb on the back of this, uh, all-powerful robot.

I enjoy the fact that like the movie just like, there's no like lead-in or anything. It's those guys are in that like thing and all of a sudden they see it on like radar. The guy's just like, holy mackerel.

Yeah.

Yes. It kicks off right away.

We're, we're right into like seeing that something's going on and then we bounce around, we see every, you know, country possible.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. I love that the way it's edited.

Yeah.

And then they— all the different, uh, guys, you know, all the different reporters doing stuff like that and like really setting up the whole thing. I, I really enjoyed that there was like no time wasted getting into what we got going on.

Yep. I really liked how that was edited between like the, the real-time news of it, kind of. That's cool.

Yeah, you got to do that exposition dump somehow, right? And like, that's not a bad mechanism for it, like doing like the real-time news reporting and like from across the world. I also appreciate, because I did the deep dive prior to watching, and Patricia Neal thought this was going to be some just run-of-the-mill flying saucer movie. And they even say in the first like minute, this is not some run-of-the-mill flying saucer, folks.

Yeah, we've seen this a few times. This is some fake lame thing.

This ain't that shit. Buckle in.

The whole buildup to him like coming out of the ship is pretty intense. I actually really like the way that's like, what's gonna happen? Like this thing just landed, he's coming out, he looks kind of weird in his suit. But yeah, I really like that. Then it kind of like— I don't know if in a good way, like the wind is taken out when he gets shot because he's kind of like, oh, he's not like— but then Gort, you know, comes down and starts blasting people. So it's kind of— it's like an interesting, like, uh, subversion almost. It was like, you know, sometimes these aliens come out— like, if it was a thing from the world, he'd just be stomping around destroying everything.

Yeah, if it was like War of the Worlds, which came out like right around the same time, right? Or maybe like 4 or 5 years earlier, they were— they came and they were there to destroy, right? That's most alien movies back then, and still to this day pretty much. The aliens are here to kill us.

Yes, this guy is here to warn us that we will die if we—

He wants to help us.

Yes.

Stop being a-holes, Earth.

He's giving us—

He also could have been like, hey, uh, I got something, uh, for your president.

He could have said something before he got to them and activated that little thing.

Yeah, I got this weird little wand thing. Oh, by the way, it's like just a pen. It's like a space pen or something.

Space pen. It writes upside down.

He's like, here, let me show you how it works. Click, bam, immediately shot.

Itchy trigger finger. And then Gort does the very calm thing up front. He just vaporizes the weapons.

Yes, he doesn't just go nuclear and kill everybody. He just takes away the weapons.

Takes away the weapons.

He starts small. He takes out the guns first, and eventually he's like, yeah, let me— I can do this as well.

Yeah. I'm gonna take out your tank.

Gort is cool. I think he's awesome.

I think Gort is a classic design.

Yeah, he looks really good. He looks really good. Very intimidating, especially when he's just like standing there not moving. You're just like, oh geez, like, because you know what he's capable of. Just anything could— like, if he gets going, he could destroy everything.

Yeah, the little visor comes up and he's got the pulsating— yes, uh, kit from Knight Rider light Under there, I like that.

Mm-hmm.

Like Knight Rider crossed with Cyclops.

Yeah, yeah, he is. But he does probably be awesome if he talked like Knight Rider.

Michael, Klaatu, Klaatu, get back inside, Klaatu.

So I also, I think it is interesting though, like that Klaatu like looks human. They show like all his ribs and his organs all seem right.

Mm-hmm.

He says he's 78. They're like, ah, he's like a 38-year-old or whatever. And he's going through all the different stuff. That guy's gonna take that salve to go study it.

Yeah.

I'm like, they just invented Neosporin. That's what that is.

Pretty much.

Yeah. Um, but like, I almost kind of thought maybe at some point in time, because again, I hadn't seen this before, uh, that it was gonna be he was from a different planet, but that was like he was still human and now here.

And he was from Earth.

Yeah.

Yeah, he's trying to deliver a message back. Um, especially when they then took Helen onto the ship. Um, I, I thought maybe there's gonna be something tied in with that. They're like, these are humans that they've— they— some humans left and came back now or something, something along those lines. But it's more just, I think he's there looking like that just so— maybe for appearances, so he doesn't freak everybody out.

Yeah, maybe. It's not clear. I kind of wish he was a little more alien, but it makes for a better, like, story of him blending in, I guess.

Yes, because he's able to walk amongst the people, try to fit Figure out how Earth people work.

Yep. Which is pretty interesting too. I like him and the kid going around and him like talking about like the Arlington Cemetery and all that stuff.

Gee, mister, you don't know nothing.

Well, I guess not. Yeah, you dumb kid. Ask me the equation for nuclear fission.

Get off my back, boy.

That's it, I'm nuking the whole world.

They go to lock him in and he just— he hears the key like locking and he just kind of smiles like, whatever. You guys can't keep me here.

Can't stop me. No, I want to go back to the doctor thing really fast because I had an actual laugh-out-loud moment. And it's like, how old do you think you would be? I don't know, 35, 38? He says he's 79 or whatever, right? He goes like, no way, he's got the lungs and heart of a whatever. They, whatever, they age differently. And then both doctors light up cigarettes.

Yeah, that was weird.

Which made me laugh. Well, everybody smoked back then. Even doctors— doctors probably prescribed cigarettes.

Klotter did it.

I thought it was potentially like a comment on, I wonder what it is that makes them live so long, they both light up cigarettes. Like that was some sort of like social commentary. But everybody in this movie smoked. Everybody did, all over the place. So I think maybe it was just like coincidence, coinkydinky. But it made me laugh though. I liked it.

Also, the other guy comes out and he's like, I just stitched up this bullet wound yesterday, now it's fully healed. Yeah, what are you gonna do now? I don't know, probably go and drink and forget that.

Yeah, yeah, realize my whole life's work has been a waste.

I mean, it's not really. You're not treating aliens.

No, right? But I guess if, uh, Mr. Klaatu comes and he advances science on Earth Like that much. That'd be awesome. But he didn't because they fucking kept shooting him.

Yeah, I would be a little hesitant to do that. Yeah, I think after the second time I'd be like, uh, all right, I'm just gonna leave you guys to it. Good luck. But Klaw II's a better man than me. He's gonna give his message one way or another because he's gonna die anyways, he says. Yeah, he's not like back permanently.

Well, he was pretty angry at the end with his message.

Yeah.

He's like, fuck y'all.

I just like, especially because like he doesn't, like he came and, you know, the first one is like a little, you know, they wounded his shoulder or whatever and healed up. This one, he was actually dead and they like kind of rebooted him and he's like, I don't know how long I have left. Now he's pissed because by the time they get back to the home planet, he might be dead.

250 billion miles away or whatever he said.

Mm-hmm.

That's a long way.

And I like that he's got kind of an edge to him because it's like he's not just the come here in peace. Like when he's talking to the scientists, like in the clip, he's like, I've— what do I have to do? Do I just have to just kill a whole city? Do I have, you know, like what do I need to do to get your guys' attention? Like he's gonna— he would— it seems like he's willing to do that if he has to, which I like that kind of like scariness about him where it's like he's here to do his mission, he's gonna try the Most peaceful way possible, but if that doesn't work, he's willing to just go as far as he has to.

Mm-hmm. He's got to do something with dramatic but non-destructive, and he just freezes all electricity or whatever on Earth for thirty minutes.

Except for except for hospitals and planes in the air.

Yeah, because he's not an asshole.

Yeah, he's not a murderer. No, he's constantly going through the whole thing being like, guys, I just want to. I need to tell you something.

Like, yeah, just fucking listen.

It's not even, it's not even his planet that's gonna like come after them. Yeah. It's the rest of the planets have kind of all gone together and created the system. And now if you guys, if we're gonna fuck it up, they're gonna come blow us up.

The robots will kill them.

They're like, who's gonna go talk to this Earth planet? And finally, Clancy's like, ah, fine, I'll do it. I guess.

It's a bunch of other aliens that don't look humanoid at all. And they're like, dude, can you just please go do it?

Fine.

Whatever. We won't teach you. You look just like him.

Hey, that's racist.

That is racist.

Go, go talk to him. You got the eyes and the ears where they're supposed to be according to humans. That's mean, you jerk. You know I'm sensitive about my weird eyes.

Yeah, I know I'm a freak to you all.

This dude, he's here. He's like, listen, we've been watching you. You suck, but you've kept your sucking to your own planet.

Yeah.

So we're like, fine, but now you're figuring out rockets? That's threatening us. We don't want this crap, so just knock it off. You know, stop being dicks.

And I don't think it's even that, like, we developed rockets. It's that we see what you do with all the rest of the stuff. You're eventually gonna use those rockets in the wrong way.

Everything you turn— you do turns into some sort of weapon.

You're not gonna come visit your neighbor planet.

Yeah, no, they might at first, but this is gonna turn bad.

It always does.

And then the robots' overlords are going to come and kill Earth if you do that.

So I'm gonna have to. He comes out and he's like, I come in peace, and they still shoot him.

Yeah, well, that pin was suspicious.

It was almost like a shillelagh or something like that.

Yeah, I don't really know. He said it was supposed to help them study other alien life forms. How?

It has a giant needle that comes off of it, and you're gonna like inject yourself so you can like get visions. Oh, suck all the juices out of the first person there.

Oh my God, I'm just gonna help you study alien species. Humans, to me, you're all human.

Yeah, exactly. What if it was like the first anal probe?

I come in peace and I brought these.

We've been watching, we know this is what some of you like and most of you don't want to admit to, but here we go.

It's like, maybe.

And when they— when it does, it, it somehow then like gives them all the knowledge of other planets also.

Like, what's the only— it's the most efficient way to inject it. Yeah, like you got to inject that knowledge somewhere, so you got to just throw it down there.

It's a giant bulbous end of a rod filled with knowledge. Yeah, it makes sense. If I were an alien species and I wanted to transmit All of my knowledge, I would do it via—

Anal probe?

Anal probe.

I might have more than one option. I might ask them which they would prefer, but yeah.

Oral or anal? Or stick it under your armpit?

I mean, there's a few options.

Yeah.

There's only 3 ways in which I know to transmit this knowledge.

Mm-hmm.

In bulk. All at once. And you do it like all at once, right?

Like, yeah. I'm not gonna spoon-feed you. Yeah.

Take forever to go through.

Better just shove it in there.

Yes. You can absorb it through the lining of your intestines.

That's the highways of the body.

They are that indeed.

So, uh, the one other thing I've— one thing I found, uh, a little odd though, and I get, obviously, if a giant robot is walking at you, Yes. You're gonna be, you're gonna freak out a little bit.

Mm-hmm.

But if you've been given like the 3 words that will like set him straight, uh, and, and like make it so he doesn't kill you, instead of like backing into a corner and then screaming and falling down, maybe just start yelling tho— those words out immediately.

Well, he didn't really say that this'll stop him. He just said, if something happens to me, you gotta give this message to Gort.

And who knows what it's gonna tell him to do?

Yeah, I think she's at the point where like, well, he's gonna vaporize me if I don't. What's the worst that can happen? He says she says the words and he blows up the Earth.

I mean, like the minute the minute he takes one the minute he takes one step towards me, I'm just yelling that out.

Yeah, court. Clad to barata nukto.

Yeah, his orders could just mean yeah, like nuke the Earth right now from orbit.

He gets in the ship, it flies away. They're like, oh, we're safe, and then the Earth explodes.

Boom. Yep. With his big old laser eyeballs.

You earned this, Earth.

And I made you do it yourself.

I used the nicest person I've met to initiate your own demise.

Yep. The ultimate payback for shooting me in the gut.

It's not in the gut, in the back. Didn't they shoot him in the back? Oh yeah, he ran away. This army in this movie sucked.

Yeah, they should have been— they should have chilled out. I feel like the Earth should have tried a little harder to, you know, adhere to this mysterious alien's plans.

But well, I mean, they they got a whole crowd of people together.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, but none of the they were all set and ready to go.

They just the army got a little trigger finger there.

It's almost the same. The creature from another world, right? Where it was like military versus science.

Yep.

Yeah, couldn't they just throw down like some? Wood put some electricity under. They could have stopped him right away.

Yeah, oh, they could electrocuted him.

Yeah, from they didn't try that. Yeah, they put him in like a weird cage. That didn't work. Should have made a wood cage. It's like the old Green Lantern. He can't use the Green Lantern ring against wood.

Is that true?

Yeah, that's like the Alan Scott Green Alan Scott. That was his weakness.

Wood.

Yep, just like Gort.

Just like Gort.

I will say like. They put the body in the, in like one of the cells in the police station and the guy's like, we gotta make sure nobody approaches that thing. And all of a sudden Gort shows up and just like takes out the wall and then, you know, he's not moving fast, but he walks away and nobody knows he's gone. Like how far away were they from the, from the cell they just put him in?

You could probably, he probably has like stealth mode.

Yeah, he has to because he walks across town and nobody sees him.

Yeah, he sneaks up on those military guys and karate chops them in the back of the head.

Yeah, well, we don't know what he did because it cut away.

Oh, he probably snapped their necks.

And they come back and they're just laying on the ground. Yeah, he could, he could have shared knowledge with them.

Yeah, their minds are blown at that time. They're still processing all that information.

And their backs.

Their backs definitely got blown.

Their minds and their backs are blown out.

That's why that lady looked so shocked. Or no, it was the son who saw it, wasn't it?

The boy watching.

Oh yeah, the son saw it.

It was like, I don't know what's going on, I'm only 11, but this is too much information for me.

I'm gonna ask my mom about this later.

Oh my God.

Gross.

Yeah, but Gort gets around town like no problem though.

Probably took a cab.

Probably.

If Gort showed up to my cab, I'd let him in. I ain't gonna say no.

Yeah. You don't— definitely don't say, hey, we nuked a tank earlier on. He could definitely nuke a cab. I bet, I bet Gort's a bad tipper though. They don't know Earth customs.

No, he's very— well, he's very robotic. He doesn't understand the—

Yeah, Klaatu's done the research for how much to tip people.

But they've only been listening to radio programming, right? They don't— did they have specials on tipping back then?

No, but he knew that he had to figure out a way to get some cash in order to go to the movies and stuff.

It's the Colgate tipping hour. We're going to talk about all the ways you could tip.

Just in case an alien species is listening, needs to know.

If I could go back in time, I would do a radio program that prefaces everything. If you're an alien species listening to this multiple years from now, here's how our culture works. And just say every week, just spend time talking about stuff.

An hour-long discussion on some random part of human culture. Drive on the, on the right side of the road when you live in the United States. You'd see the right-of-ways when on the right side, and if you're supposed to stop at the same time.

Yes, 4-way stops, they're real tricky.

Now what would be a fun prank is if you, uh, told the aliens everything wrong. Oh, and they show up and they don't understand anything. That would be a funny prank on the aliens.

Yeah, until they— that's when they send up the robot police.

Oh, I'm gonna get arrested by the robot police because I maybe— I don't think—

no, I don't think you're getting arrested.

You're just gonna vaporized. That seems like a vaporizing thing.

Lying is a vaporized offense?

When you, when you're doing it as, when you're doing it as a prank, yes.

Hmm. I feel like I need to be read my rights by this robot police.

They're still gonna shoot you with the laser, but you know, that's fine.

That's the one universal truth.

Now, if you just told them stuff and it was like, oh, you messed up, sure. But if you're doing it and you're like, ah, we're just gonna prank them and tell them the wrong thing If I'm like telling them that, giggling into my hand afterwards, like, hee hee hee. Yep.

I choose to believe I wouldn't get executed for such a thing.

Yeah.

I think Cloth would find it hilarious. He's there to save, to save the world. I've been listening to this radio broadcast. I understand human culture now.

I love how informative that Professor Reverso is every week.

Reverse.

Oh yeah, what a great name that is. Drive on the left side of the road. Yes.

Up is down and left is right. And you tip 3%.

Oh, that's the one that really gets you in trouble.

I traveled 250 billion miles to read a sign that says, if you can't afford to tip, you can't afford to eat here. Leaves a pile of extraterrestrial diamonds.

Oh God, if he met me and he even offered up 1 or 2 diamonds, I'd be like crying.

Please, I can't use these anywhere.

I don't know how to sell these.

I can't make change out of this.

Who was gonna buy this? I had— oh, I have connections. You're going to the Kay Jewelers in the mall trying to see if they'll buy diamonds off you.

That might be like the one main flaw that he's got is he's been listening to all these radio broadcasts and all. Why does he think that like diamonds will be an acceptable form of like currency when he gets here?

Like, you're a girl's best friend.

That's a lot.

He's best friend too.

Well, he came, you know, uh, or he heard Earth girls are easy.

Oh, he heard that? Yeah, probably on the radio.

Yeah, probably. So here he is. I'm here to find a bride. I got diamonds and anal probes.

I come from an all-male society. Like that one.

Well, did we do it, boys?

Yes.

Did we get through The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951?

We did.

I believe we did. I believe we did.

All right, well, what did you guys think of The Day the Earth Stood Still from 1951?

I enjoyed it. I mean, we watched a couple of these older movies, um, over like the last 2 years. Uh, this might be like one that I've enjoyed the most as far as those type of like you know, the old black and white, uh, type movies. There's enough sci-fi in it to make it that way, but a lot of it is just like, oh, like fish out of water type thing. But like him going around and just trying to almost make like a judgment as well of like, hey, these— are these guys— are these people good? Are they bad? And I mean, he keeps just seeing the worst of everything except for Bobby and Helen. Um, but I like— I liked it. I like the fact that it wasn't like some crazy Uh, over-the-top sci-fi thing that wouldn't have— I don't think would have looked all that great. Um, this is just enough that it, it's just, it does, it looks of the time, but also it doesn't try to make itself, you know, too weird or anything like that.

Yeah, I really like this movie. It's really good. I think, um, definitely has like a cool premise, has some interesting things to say about, you know, this has a nice theme going on with the film. Versus some of these old sci-fi movies like The Thing from Another World, where it's like, they might come from the skies, and you're like, what are you talking about? Like, what? There was no theme really besides maybe science and military or whatever. But this is, this is like a really well put together movie, and it feels very, uh, well written, well directed. It's meaningful, um, and it's got some good tension in it and stuff too. It's just kind of an interesting, cool movie.

I agree. This movie's— this movie still holds up after all these years. I probably haven't seen it in 2, 3 decades, to be honest. It's been a long time. Like, just like you guys said, it's got all the things that we, like, we wanted from the other old movies.

Yes.

It has a message, has a purpose, has a point of view, does interesting things. It just— it suffers from Old movie pacing, pretty much.

Yep.

But it has cool effects too, from— for even for 1951. I always thought that the door opening up on the spaceship was awesome because you don't see it, it just kind of appears.

Yeah, with a full, full ramp and everything.

Yeah. And Gordon moving the boat, he could just—

he could easily just slide down, you know.

Oh, that'd be awesome. Did he come out the top and just slid down across the hood, Dukes of Hazzard style?

Yeah, here's some Southern rock playing.

Wearing the Daisy Dukes while he comes out.

Gort wearing Daisy Dukes, twerking down the ramp.

Is he twerking?

Yes, in 1951. That's what Gort does.

Wow, he reinvented the twerk.

Well, it's on all the other planets, and if they could have used the anal probe thing, you would have known that.

Man, wouldn't it be called twerk? It'd be called Gorting.

Do the gort. People wouldn't be scared of Gort. They'd be clamoring around him.

Everybody'd be dancing around him as he's twerking or gorting.

Instead of like a weird Cyclops death ray, it could be like a strobe light for like, you know, dancing and stuff like that. Different modes. Yeah, that'd be awesome. He's like an EDM DJ, basically.

Yeah. He's got little speakers come out the side of his head.

That would also blow 1950s minds. Like, they've never heard that before.

No. We come from across the stars, Claudius, to bring you this futuristic music.

Behold the future.

Behold, I dropped the bass.

That would be awesome.

The whole ship is just a giant speaker.

And it seems like, yeah, it just like goes up on its side and it's a subwoofer.

Yeah, I think they'd get shot immediately.

You get shot immediately no matter what.

That's true. It don't matter what you do.

You could twerk, you could DJ, you could just show them a weird little pen with knives in it. Yeah, probes maybe.

Probes, who knows? Well, we know what we thought. What did the internet have to say? Well, on April 4th, 2006, James_Nash had this to say. This is my childhood movie.

Derek?

It's not me. I remember watching this on TV, sat on my dad's lap. It was scary, exciting, and held my full attention. Whenever I see this film now, I am that little boy again. God bless you, Klaatu and Gorta. I would love to see a remake of this movie as I think the story has not dated in any way. Come on, 20th Century Fox, let's get a remake going. After all, you remade all the other classics, dot dot, Planet of the Apes and so on.

What has he done?

Hold on a second. When is, when is this review from?

2006.

2006. When did the Keanu one come out?

2008.

He made a mistake by putting this into the universe.

Wait, there's still more.

I've never seen the remake.

Hold on.

Ready? And this is all caps. Ready? Who would you cast as Klaatu today? Would you want Gort as CGI or a cool Stan Winston costume? I reckon Hugh Grant as Klaatu and definitely go for a costume rather than the CGI.

Is that your comment or is that—

No, that's what he says.

Okay. I was just making sure.

You're great. Sure.

Yeah. Or how about a sequel where an army of Gorts come destroy Earth because we did not listen to their warning?

Yes, I like that idea because they could just say like this happened in the '50s and now it's modern day, things haven't changed, and now it's like it's gotten worse.

Here come the Gorts.

I mean, he sets it up for the potential for sequel by explaining everything, so I mean, that would make sense.

Well, one person found that helpful. Whoa, not so much. 10 out of 10.

The Day the Earth Sat Still. It's just a sequel.

But not to be outdone, on April 19th, 2009, Peacemaker12 had this to say. Great for the '50s, not even worth looking at in the 21st century.

Wow.

You cannot review a movie based on what it was in its time.

Okay.

It's the 21st century, and now this movie doesn't hold a single candle to movies now. Honestly, the special effects alone are below Power Rangers. There is no realism whatsoever to the actions of Klet— yeah, I'm not gonna— he blends a slur with Kletu.

Uh-oh.

If you're going to call humans stupid, at least realize the propulsion system on your spacecraft is subpar and of horrible design. Not to mention the camera work. All of a sudden, the people start running at 2x regular camera speed. What's up with that?

God.

There is no suspension of disbelief I found myself laughing at the movie within 5 minutes. Watch a real movie, people. Stop being nostalgic, biased reviewers. 12 found that helpful. 88, not so much.

Wow. That is the most not so much as I think I've ever heard.

Yes. 1 out of 10. It's the only 1 out of 10 review that exists on—

Finally, a non-biased review. Thank God.

Yep.

542 reviews, only one 1-star.

Yeah, that's—

that guy's—

that guy's dad didn't hold him in his lap while they watched it. That's his problem.

No, no, he hates old films. He's biased against old films.

Yes. Watch a real movie, people.

Like what? I'd love to hear what the real movies are.

Sounds like he— sounds like he needs one of those, uh, things that PLATO had, but like for movies.

Like what, anal probes?

Probes. Yeah.

So instead of teaching about life on other planets, it just shows you all the history Oh, he absorbs all movies through his rectum?

Wow. Wow, that would be— that might be a faster way to watch movies. I got a lot of movies I need to watch.

Oh God. But in those movies are things like Sharktopus. Do you want Sharktopus going through the highways of your body?

I don't want Sharktopus going through the highway of my body, no.

Well.

I don't want it.

Especially with those, like, Horny teeth coming out of his gills.

Yeah, he might get stuck.

Yeah, that'd be painful. Barbs.

Young shark with horn.

Don't need barbs in my intestines.

No, I would say that's one of the last places I'd ever want a barb.

Yeah, it's actually my mantra. No barbs in my large intestine. Thank you.

Appreciate it.

Much appreciated. Appreciate it.

Is that a bumper sticker?

Yes. Honk if you don't want barbs in your rectum.

I would honk at that if I saw that. I would honk because I don't, I don't like bumper stickers, but that would make me honk.

There's like an old guy driving, it's like, are they talking about you?

What?

Or ironically, like, it's somebody, it's a lady named Barb.

Yeah, it's this guy's wife named Barb. Barb, I think that's about you.

No, I'm talking about Barb has it on her car.

Oh, I don't want Barb's in my rectum. Well, yeah, Barb, Barb, whatever.

She ain't like that.

No, she ain't like that at all. Even though it's her own body, she can do whatever she wants.

Do whatever she wants. Well, she just can't go into my rectum, but she can go into Hers, what she wants. Or others are consenting to. Oh boy.

All right, I think we did it with gusto.

Yeah, on that note, yeah, we definitely did it.

These Tuesday recordings get weird.

Uh, we go in some weird places sometimes, and I feel like I'm really thrown off. I was a little like— I was a little, uh, what's the word? Uh, I knew I was warming up in the beginning, but I feel like We really got going towards the end.

Yeah, I don't want to edit a single thing out of this episode, I don't think. It's also—

you can edit a few things.

Nope, I might put stuff in. Ah, we got through dub 1 of M10. M stands for—

wow.

So that means we're on to dub 2, and that's a Keith dub. Keith, what are you adding to our order form from Columbia House?

All right. Uh, man, this was, I'll be honest, this was tough. There's a lot of things that are like things we've already watched. There are a lot of, uh, movies on this list that are tangential to things that we've watched before.

Things have been mentioned. Lots of 'em. Yeah.

Lots, lots of things have been mentioned also. Um, I, I think sometimes things that I could easily see coming up on like a, like a future month, uh, like a theme for stuff.

Um, mm-hmm.

You know, there's a lot of things here that would fit in there. But one thing that stood out to me that I, I don't know any other time that it would really fall into the type of themes we come up with, things like that. It just doesn't seem like it fits in anywhere. Um, and so I think we're going to do, uh, number 29410. I think that's an 82 and it's The Wizard of Oz.

Wow. I did not expect that.

That's unexpected.

I was really worried you were going to say the Bible.

That may never come up.

The Wizard of Oz.

Yeah. Wow.

All right.

It doesn't seem like— I think if it would come up, it would probably be like a wheel option. I just don't see where we would ever have that really fit in anywhere. I mean, granted, we come up— it's any movie and we come up with plenty of options for any movie, but that one just seems so kind of—

I know why you did this.

You do?

Oh, well, well, well.

He wanted the oldest movie.

He's trying to steal our thunder.

He broke up my bookends of the newest and the oldest.

He totally did it. You've, you've robbed him.

No, I didn't.

He robbed me.

There are Like 3 or 4 other movies I actually did put into some consideration beforehand.

But there were some perks to picking this one. There were some perks.

All right.

Yeah.

Sure. Sure.

Other movies are on here. Maybe I can get in on this.

All right. Well, boys, we did it. We got through the first dub of M10 and then we're on to Dub 2, which is Dubizard of Oz.

Oh, I see what you did there.

Zardoz over here.

Again, it's a Tuesday.

Oh, that's true.

Zardoz is based off of the title Wizard of Oz.

That's why Keith picked it.

That is why Keith picked it.

No, that would be exactly why I wouldn't have picked Zardoz. I want to change, I want to change my pick now.

Plenty of chances to bring up that joke.

I need to change it now.

You can't. No, Zardoz is on the books. Could be an annual wheel spin, Zardoz.

I'd love it just to be on that big wheel at the end, just in case it pops up one more time.

I agree. All right. Well, I guess that leaves us in this position here where we have nothing to do but to end this in a way in which we end everything.

Yep, it's that classic ending we always do.

Seems fairly obvious.

Oh, wait a minute, the words.

Right, right, right.

Say the words. Nectai.

Nectar. Nickel.

Noodle.

It's an N-word.

It's definitely an N-word. It was definitely an N-word.

Klaatu!

Merada!

Okay then, that's it.

Thanks for listening to Fumbling Through Film. New episodes drop every Thursday. Got feedback or questions? Email us at [email protected]. You can see our films to fumble before you tumble into the grave and other musings on Letterboxd at Fumble Through Film. The through is T-H-R-U. You can also follow Keith on Instagram @kg3030lives and on Letterboxd at kg3030. Terry is on Letterboxd at Terry2099. Derek is on Letterboxd at Derek, the number 9, and then the word 9. All original music is done by the Dr. Dre of Kansas, Terry, so hit him up for them bangers. Our new podcast logo is done by the delightful and talented Sanjay Vicky Nayak. You can find her on Instagram at Einkstein. That's Einstein with a K in there. We'll see you next week as we keep on fumbling.

That's way too good of a—

This is where I'm gonna edit. I saw, I saw a thing today online, and I'm gonna edit all this out so I got no words yet. This kid, his name is Cross. C-R-O-S-S.

First name?

Yes. Like, I want to say Cross— I can't remember what his middle name was, but he was having a Jesus-themed 5th birthday. Oh, and it was getting viral. It's like, Jesus, this kid's name is Cross. His parents are mentally ill. They're mentally ill.

That's just too much. Why not do something like, you know, like John?

Yeah, any biblical name would have worked, but he chose, you know, Cross.

If your birthday is on Christmas, then I think maybe you're allowed to do that.

But Christmas is even like a real thing.

Like, no, but it's, it's kind of— it's— but it's the recognized day.

But I'd rather— yeah, I'd rather be named Christmas than Cross.

Yeah, I'd be really— I'd rather be named Lots— I keep— Pile O' Trash than Cross. Oh, trash. Yes.

All right, beep.

Now I know to edit between those 2 beeps.